Once upon a time… a poem

once-upon-a-time

 

[Once upon a time

is over played

we shouldn’t say it

or use it

ever

yet still...]

 

Once upon a time

there was a girl

who thought

too much

she was sure

sometimes

but the doubt

over turned

the truth

so she hide

in the recesses

of her imaginary world

inside her head

shadows

choked the light

ominous music

misheard comments

 

lies

hate…

loathing…

 

fear

Fear

FEAR

that if she

did it

“IT”

the big I-T

the scary thing

if she did…

the world would judge

and she would

fall

 

 

Once upon a time

there was a young woman

who moved past

all that

she “helped” anyone

she “helped”everyone

near or far

close enough &out of reach

it distract her

and nothing

changed

shadows morphed

music swelled

voices clamor

growing so LOUD

sleep. never. comes

awake

 

lies

hate…

loathing…

 

fear

Fear

FEAR

It’s better to

not

be seen

ever, ever

never

ever, ever

ever

no

because…

 

Once upon a time

she grew older

a woman, I guess

she conquered it all

except…

for that thing

she refused to notice

feel

      see

               touch

                                    allow near her

until she was tired

unless she was drunk

depressed

alone

 

… alone …

 

the darkness

encompassing

the voices

butchery

she lay dead

because it is

it is..

it

 

the fear…

part of her…

lies…

hate…

loathing…

 

too late.

it is

what it

always was

how do you

change?

how do you

stop?

make it

stop.

Stop..

STOP…

 

Once upon a time

there was me

and I had to admit

to myself

what was wrong

and I had to

move out of the

shadows

stop listening to

the voices

and look myself

SQUARE

in the face.

 

I had to say:

 

SHUT UP!

 

Because the voice

is my own

and the shadows

I created

and the fear

is unfounded

UNFOUNDED

mendaciously

created by weakness

failure to see

me

as

me

 

and then I

realize

that

once upon a time

hasn’t even begun

…yet…

 

 

 

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